If you’ve been reading my blog long enough you know that Mother Mary Mom is convinced I have been trying to kill her ever since I was a toddler. One of her biggest claims is I threw a bed frame at her head like a spear when she was knitting socks for soldiers in ‘Nam while reading to the elderly blind people in the apartment building. Today she called with “proof” that I had been at it long before she remembered, on account of the brain hemorrhage that resulted from the Incident of ’71. You can listen for yourself in this voicemail she left me today:

A History of Violence.

For all the dear Mother Mary Mom fans out there, she really does talk to me the same way she writes. She cracks me up. I should crack her one again up, too.

I love you Mommie Dearest!

Edited to add: PEOPLE. Please do yourselves a favor and download Quicktime so you can enjoy Web 2.0 media. They even have it for Windows. And welcome to the Internet.  You’ll love it ;)  More tomorrow…